THIS IS WHY WE DO IT! by Janice M. Wilson

I am often asked how I do it or how I get my inspiration (easy – nature!), but once in a while someone will ask WHY do I do it?  Usually followed by a question of have I been published (yes) and how much money I make (not much – yet!) but it seems unfathomable to many that I can sit for hours and just………..well, write.   Usually for no monetary reward.

Well, the idea!

I guess many consider it a chore, or they don’t think they have it in them. Do they mean to finish something or write an epic bestseller?  Probably both, because both require commitment, talent and luck.  Or maybe they simply don’t like to nor have the time to write.

But I ask them who wrote all those books in libraries and bookstores?  They read them, or at least see the latest movie made from the latest bestseller novel.  Yes, those books. Someone else can make the time to sit and write them. I can too.

Who writes?

Ordinary people like you and me, and out of those – the diligent who didn’t give up get published!

About WHAT?

There really are only 7 main topics of life to write about:

1.     man against man

2.     man against nature

3.     man against himself

4.     man against God

5.     man against society

6.     man caught in the middle

7.     man and woman

It’s all been said before.   So why bother?

Because we continue to live it all.  Over and over again – all of them. And as long as man continues to live them, the questions of overcoming them are pondered, experienced, and reflected. With success or failure, the cycle never stops.

Hence – we write.

We write to vent.

We write to share.

We write to understand.

We write to create.

We write to educate.

We write to escape.

We write to capture time.

We write to feel/be felt.

As long as we live and breath in love, fear, joy, sorrow, faith, pain and hope – we all speak through our souls about life somehow.  Some of us do it in affection, gifts, touch, words.

And some bare their souls through ink.

It’s what we do.

Dealing With Negativity

Dealing with Negativity

(From the people whose opinions you actually care about)

I can’t tell you how many book dedications I’ve read where writers thank their family for putting up with them while they were in the throes of writing their book, their kids eating peanut butter sandwiches so mommy can keep writing and so on and so forth.

I think that’s wonderful. I also wonder (with a certain feeling of shame for doubting their veracity) whether their families really were as supportive as all that. 

Because mine is not.

My kids don’t care whether or not I’m trying to squeeze out time to write a book. They want dinner, and help with homework, they want clean plates to eat off and clean clothes to wear. Books be damned, they want mommy dates and snuggle time. My boy wants a chance to work through how some kids at school called him stupid because he has autism and is hyper-focused on Elvis, the king of rock and roll this month, and Elvis is Not Cool. My girl wants a chance to talk over how some little girl was her friend last week and this week hates her and is hanging out with some other little girl.

This is life-shattering stuff for them folks.

Then there’s my husband who thinks its all a waste of time, that I’ll never finish any of it, (except I did) and even if I do, I’ll never make any money off of it (probably true) so why not focus on something that actually brings in a living wage. Of course, I already make a living wage a different way, so then writing in his mind is a hobby. And hobbies shouldn’t take away from snuggle time and eating chips in bed while watching Supernatural with him, from doing “my Fair Share” of paperwork and dealing with crap all adults have to do but never want to like incorrect bills and disputes about who is responsible for replacing the air conditioning system. Hobbies are for doing in free time.

And you know what? They have a point.

Writing is a huge time suck. And my kids deserve all those things they need. My husband shouldn’t have to deal with all the crap of life because I want to—let me rephrase that—I need to write.

I get it. 

But I don’t get “free time.”  I’m not even sure I believe in this mythical thing  people call Free Time.

Any time I have is stolen--I get it by not doing something else I should be doing.

So how do you avoid this kind of negativity from the people whose opinions you actually care about: your close friends and family?  And if you can’t avoid it, how do you deal with it?

The question isn’t rhetorical folks.

I have no idea what the answer is.  I would have liked to quote that biblical verse about how a prophet isn’t respected in their hometown. But lets face it—I’m no prophet. Probably you aren’t either.  And to be fair, these people in our lives have a valid point. So what do we do?

For now, my answer is to try to prioritize. I try to meet my family’s needs as best I can (and buy paper plates so I spend less time doing dishes.) 

(Sorry Earth.) 

I cut writing time out of sleep time and reading time.  I deny myself so that I don’t have to deny them.

It means everything comes so much slower writing wise.

It means I’m tired a lot.

It means sometimes writing feels like a chore, not a joy.

But the words still come.

What do you guys do? Is there a better way?